Challenge 1

07/24/12 - 416lbs  Yesterday, I posted about two of the challenges the chair team leaders came up with for us this week. The first one was to stand in front of the mirror and look at yourself to find something you loved about yourself. Some people found this very easy to do, but most of us really struggled with it. I know I had a really hard time with this. I don't like what I see in the mirror. I am surprised every time I catch a glimpse of myself. I can be really feeling god that day, thinking I look nice and then, wham, I see a reflection of myself somewhere. In my head I'm fat, but not this fat. I know we are supposed to focus on non-scale victories rather than a number on a little screen, but really? I am doing two sets of two stairs in my forty five minute workout. Mom and Dad feel confident enough to go away for 4 days in Aug. and Sept.. As happy as I am about those things, it doesn't eliminate the shock when you catch a glimpse at yourself. I can't seem to wrap my head around loving something that is this big. I know I'm a good person, and there is a lot about myself that I wouldn't change. Having said that, there is almost nothing on the outside I want to keep. When you're working to change yourself and you know it's a going to be a long journey, how do I learn to love myself, when I can't look at myself?